"Heaven" Julia Michaels
He was scared to read it. I sent him a link to a post about him. I hope this side of me doesn't freak him out, I'm just exploring myself. But I can tell he's read it when I get a message from him, of my exact quote but him saying, "I'd leave no part on you untouched or without a kiss." My stomach fell. We spend the next, I don't know how long as I lost track of time, few hours sending hot and heavy messages. One of my surprised exhales was a bit too loud and played it off with a cough. Hope my blush didn't give myself away. I'm excited and hopeful. I thought my trip home this summer would be boring and uneventful. But now I have about 3 months of fantasizing how this can go down. Sex isn't always the glamorous steamy everything seemingly perfectly fitting and working out; it can be awkward. I smile because how ever it is, it will be our experience. I get to experience him experiencing me. Working me. Finally all of him and all of me. 20 years of wanting him. I need to get to the gym, I need some physical activity to work this off. Drumming tonight will be so welcomed as it's a physical and mental workout. Maybe this week I will hit the gym some extra days. It will help. My brain doesn't want to stay focused, we want to go take a bath lie back and feel my thoughts. I want to caress my body while thinking about him. I want to fantasize about the time we get to see each other again. Warm water, bubbles and slippery wet skin. Fingers caressing. Pinching. Inserting. His magnetic pull to me, and me to him is strong and undeniable. In our office where our cubicles sat there was no way to see the front entrance yet, I knew the second when he walked in. The hairs on my neck would stand. Electric. I remember hearing about his return move from out of state, I knew he might come back to the county but didn't know when. The county had a large county meeting with multiple departments. Auditorium full of people, and I knew the minute he entered. Not even knowing if he was back in town. I felt he was there. My butterflies in my stomach bounced frantically around; scanned the room and there he was. We took turns working the public counter. However, when I relieved him of his breaks he just took the desk behind me, staying in the room. Behind me. I could feel him watching me. His eyes caressing me, and undressing me. I could feel his hands from his imagination sliding up my thighs, reaching my center to finger me. I purposely would wear skirts on those days I was to relieve him. I wanted him to drink in my legs and my thighs. On our smoke breaks he said once he could see through my skirt; hadn't planned that but excited me he was turned on. All these memories provoke so many feelings inside my head and my body. Before we reignited and I just sent emails about his doppelganger, I didn't think it would go anywhere other than a few sexy emails. However, that exchange was enough for me to want to be alone. I needed a hot shower that day. I wanted a few minutes exploring; a fantasy of him and my body's reaction. I turn the shower knob to hot and open the window wide. I don't care if my neighbors can see my wet erect tits. A billow of fog appeared as the cold air from the open window is spilling inside. I sit on the tub floor facing the faucet; the hot water falling on my skin. I wait a few minutes until my flesh turns bright red and becomes sensitive. The skin on my upper thighs, forearms and top of breasts have become bright red like a sunburn. Making it a little hotter still, I turn the hot faucet more. The bathroom has turned into a steam room. Deciding my skin is burned enough I turn the handle towards cold. I get the temperature slightly colder than luke warm. The water is cold enough to sit under without shivering but cold enough to cause a small sting on my slightly burned skin. These extremes, hot and cold heighten the nerves on my skin. Delicious sensation my burnt flesh stinging from the cold water sent to care for the burn excites my mind. Leaning back, knees bent and legs splayed I can feel the water droplets falling gently on my exposed cunt. I exhale as the cool water caresses my burns. I prop up my left arm behind me holding me up at a sweet spot of an angle. I grab a handful of my right breast wishing it was his hand. Pulling and pinching my nipple. Fondling the red soft wet skin. Gently lifting my breast up, with thumb and forefinger I pinch my nipple. My large areolas pulls tightly as my nipple becomes more erect. Stiff, waiting for the warmth of his mouth. If only he was in front of me. I can see his smile now. Watching me. Wanting to see me warm myself, prepare myself for him. A slight game who can hold out the longest. He's waiting for me to beg for him. I am holding out until he takes me for himself. Who will make the first move? With this thought I lean back further. My eyes roll up, lids slowly close. Thoughts of his face inches away, so close to my exposed eager pussy. His eyes taking me all in. My fingers pull up off from my pinched nipple. Hand slides down caressing the underside of my breast; side to side feeling the space where my breast meets my chest. Warm. My hand glides to the side of my breast downward to the my abdominal oblique which is tightening up helping to hold my lean. Hand is now down to my hip, eager to be grabbed. With my thighs still bright red from the hot water, I glide my hand to the point of my knee and slowly make my way to my inner thigh. The skin here is softer and with friction of my pressed hand, I pull gently. Pulling my leg wide to the side leaning it against the side of the bathtub; a short exhale of frustration escapes me. Really wanting him in front of me, I'm aching. Wanting no introduction I slip two fingers inside me. My vaginal muscles tugging at my fingers, pulling them in. Warm. Wet. I moan softly. His eyes watching, his pupils dilate. He's studying his prey, calculating the opportune time to pounce. I lick my lower lip before drawing it in my mouth. My stomach relaxes with my exhale while slowly sliding my fingers out of my vaginal grip. My now lubricated fingers glide through my folds; my soft thin inner lips then to the outer thick fuller lips, draping my slippery honey. I slide up and press down on my pubic mound. Fingers slide down and I pull back the hood reaching for my engorged clit. Slowly making circles around, I press gently and teasingly into the sides. Thought of him sitting there smiling at me, and not at me really. He's smiling at my open, exposed, eager, aching pussy. Open and splayed wanting and aching for his face; his hot breath, his wet mouth and the pressure of his tongue. The tub I'm currently in fades away and becomes a lush hotel bed. I'm still propped up, leaning back and he's sitting in a chair across from me. He's leaning back expecting me to continue his show. With my legs bent and splayed open, nerve endings are excited with the little gentle circles I have been carrying out on my clit. Now warmed up, I've become sensitive to the slight room temperatures changes; the waxing and waning of his hot breath is felt. He's watching my cunt like he's going to pounce. His eyes full of lust and hunger. He's studying his prey. I'm feeling weak with pleasure and from him pulling my energy. The low lights in the room can't hide how excited I can see he is. And he wants me to notice; he grabs through his pants the top of his hard cock sliding his hand down and cupping his balls. Fuck. I want to worship his dick so bad and he knows this. He's using that to make me wetter. He wants me to squirm for him. It's working. I'm hurting. I take my fingers from my clit and insert them in my mouth. Wanting his cock instead, I get my fingers wet with my hot eager mouth. I moan. With fingers still in my mouth and my eyes locked onto his, I slide my ass to the edge of the bed, closer to him. Tempting him to come take it. Spreading my legs wide, I pull my fingers out of my mouth and slip one finger inside my pussy. Then a second finger pops in. As a third enters, I hear him suck his breath in. Slowly, I remove my fingers and have an urge to palm myself, I need my hand to be pressed against my vulva. I need everything to be touched, fondled and stroked. I lick my bottom lip while watching him watch me. My fingers pressed together flush against my vulva I begin moving my hand side to side. Adding a little more pressure I move my hand slowly up and down and my fingers hitch my vaginal opening, tugging. My thumb pad applies pressure to my clit. Eyes close and roll back. Suddenly, my only conscious thought is of my pussy throbbing for an orgasm. Needing a release. He smiles, he notices his prey is now at her weakest. With that he quietly gets up and places himself on the floor in front of her. I feel the slight movement of the bed as he places his hands either side of my wide open legs. My heart is racing. With eyes still closed, my skin is crawling with electricity, waiting for his touch. My entire body is covered in hot goosebumps. I feel his breath on my right inner thigh. His hand then grabs my outer thigh and he gently places a kiss on my inner thigh. Three quick inhalations and a slow long exhale leaves me. I begin to shake. I remove my hand. but he places it back. He wants me to continue with his face so close. The torture of this, when all I want is to feel his hot wet mouth on me. As silently ordered, I obey and continue to palm myself. My hand is moving more rapidly, side to side. I can feel my folds moving back and forth as I continue to rub myself. My breaths becoming more shallow as I'm getting closer. My thighs tighten and straighten upwardly; that's when he gently picks my hand up and places it on the bed. Almost in tears I exhale at this moment of relief. Both of his hands now are under my ass. My body shakes in anticipation for what is about to take place. I'm back in my body, back in the shower. My legs pressed hard up against the sides of the tub. I can imagine him in between my thighs. Kissing them gently. Kissing each one as a prayer before his meal. At this point I will usually close my eyes and use my imagination. This time however, I kept my eyes open. Imagining he was actually licking me. How I would look down at him working on me, with his mouth. He'd come up and kiss me so I can taste how excited I am. I want to feel his tongue in my mouth knowing it was going to go back down and finish me. While he's kissing me he slips his hand down inserting a finger. Then he adds his second finger. And a third finger inside of me while he's giving me wet sloppy passionate kisses. He's eager to get back to work. He pulls his fingers out slowly while his tongue and lips leave my mouth. My breath quickens because I know he's going to return to finish me. He's going to make me cum hard. With the cool water falling on me I can feel I'm getting close. I look down in between my propped up thighs and the image of my hand is replaced with his sexy bald head going to town on me. I want to cry and cry out with euphoric pleasure, I need him so badly. Want his mouth on me. I want him sucking on my clit. I want his mouth kissing and licking me everywhere. My hands still flush rubbing faster and faster moving up closer to my clit. Pressure from my thumb I make circles as I imagine his fingers inside me while he's sucking on my clit. And with that my thighs tighten, I suck in my breath and bite my lower lip to keep myself from screaming out as my orgasm starts. The wave begins, my stomach tightens, back arches and eyes remain open as if he's down there. I lighten my pressure to keep the wave going. Thoughts of him looking up at me watching me so intimately, I quietly cry out with my last wave crashing through my body. My stomach relaxes as I lean further back, my heart is pounding in my chest. I can't help but smile. Intense every time I cum thinking of him but that was something else. Intense. This pull he has over me even in fantasy it's intense.
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"Let's Get It On" Marvin Gaye
I've been really tryin', baby Tryin' to hold back this feeling for so long And if you feel like I feel, baby Then, c'mon, oh, c'mon Almost 6 hours of sleep, good enough. I couldn't sleep. It's because my mind was up thinking and itching to write. I have no clue where to start, how to formulate paragraphs, nor work sentence structures. My mind blank. The butterflies in my stomach have been frenzied with arousal. Fuck the flutters. Like a metal detector setting off louder the closer it gets to the hidden treasures. My butterflies are going stir crazy with excitement; detecting a highly prized object worth possessing. Him. This site is a culmination of sexual fantasy and reality, he first and foremost certainly deserves to be here. The reason this blog site is called "B". I melt when he calls me B; for 'butterfly'. He was my work crush. Hard crush. I remember the day I had to call him for an interview. I worked in the same office with my mom and remember the time when she was talking about him she emphasized the word, "married". More memories come rushing back. I'd love to just sit back and let them wash over me, wet me. "Slow Motion" Juvenile However my mind is doing laps and I'm on limited time for me to sit and finger myself on memory lane. My work crush, still after 20 years. The one I never had a chance to be with. One of the reasons I ran out of state. I don't even remember when our flirting started, nor does it matter. I fell hard and painfully crushed when I came to the realization it wouldn't happen between him and I. He was married dealing with his demons. Then when I moved he divorced and got married again. Then came his child. I was crushed again. We talked off and on through out the years, flirted a bit. Even had chances to see him every time I went back home for visits but he always bailed on me. Left me hanging. If my chapter with him was to have a title, "Left Hanging" would be it. It hurt a lot. My body ached. He was the only one that could be my match and had the ability to keep me on my toes. He challenged me, encouraged me and made me lust for him. I think his fight with his demons made him appear as an asshole, but I knew such a sweet sexy soul existed just underneath that gruff facade. The only guy that made me nervous. It was difficult at work if we were in a group together, he could just look at me and I couldn't contain my naughty thoughts about him pushing me up against the copy machine. I would easily blush if he just smiled my way, giving me away in front of others. I feel like our attraction to each other and sexual tension was palpable; I thought for sure we were going to get into some kind of trouble with work. ASMR, man the sound of his voice makes me wet. I giggle like a school girl when we would talk on the phone. My smile would hurt my face. Memories of AOL instant messaging, we chatted one night and he convinced me to give him my number. He called and we talked all night, fell asleep on the phone. He did. I was too excited to have had him and his attention for that long. During the conversation we some how thought it would be a good idea if we just kissed each other and got it over with. Certainly that would help ease the sexual tension. We both took some classes at the local community college. We could meet there. Day of he was out playing basketball and he could run over as I'm going to my class. Waiting in the parking lot in my Wrangler, I was looking for the car he told me he was driving. My heart was racing. I thought I was going to pass out. We were going to kiss. I thought about chickening out, I could just leave and tell him my class was cancelled. As I was contemplating a quick get away, I see his vehicle pull in. He pulls up next to me. I try to act cool, calm and collect; I hop out and walk over to him. He's leaning against his car, as I walk over biting my lip because I'm shaking so bad. No time wasted, we may have said hello or maybe not. He takes a couple of fingers on each hand and hooks them in the waistband of my black pants and pulls me to him. Leans down and I melt into him. I'm wet recalling this memory. I ended up skipping class that night. I went home and masturbated for a couple of hours to the memory of that kiss. Fantasizing of jumping in his car and running off somewhere to fuck. I laugh because I think we seriously thought a kiss would ease the tension. It made it worse. I knew what the lips of that smile felt like on mine. Stolen hand caressing and long gazes continued until I fled the state. I gave him a heartfelt letter begging him if I ever had a chance with him to please just tell me and I would stay and not leave. Maybe his demons prevented him from reading the letter and stopping me. Over the years we managed to keep in contact. We'd flirt back and forth a few times then he was a complete asshole to me leaving me hanging. Getting me excited and hopeful and he'd bail. No explanation. No word. So no big deal recently we exchanged emails with a little flirting sprinkled throughout. I wanted to congratulate him on his one year being sober. I was even more happy to read it will actually be two years this April. I could tell he was happy too. No sign of the asshole. So maybe he wants to really play this time? It seemed before I would scare him off. I wanted to try to keep myself in check and let him know I could be a good friend if he needed or wanted. Also told him to pay no attention to my talk, if we were in person or on the phone I would be tongue tied with a dumb smile on my face and nervous as hell. Excited a little at his reply to my being tongue tied. But this dance has happened before. I would be forgotten by the next day until a few months later. When normally our conversations would abruptly end from getting heated, we moved to snap. I shared with him earlier that evening while in the shower I came hard thinking about his face in between my thighs; he seems like he would worship my pussy. I told him I want to sit on him. He asked which direction. While I was typing my answer of facing him because I wanted to kiss him and look him in his eyes. He already said he wanted to look me in my eyes and play with my hair while kissing me. Fuck that was it. I'm hooked again, however this time I told him how he always bails on me after it gets hot and heavy. He said things are different this time, he's sober and he's promised he's not leaving. "Ride" Slo Mo Ty Dolla $ign, K Camp I haven't been touched, caressed, fucked or made love to in eight years. It will be nine this December. This man is sexy. He makes me nervous, blush from naughty thoughts and yet I'm completely uninhibited with him. He matches my intelligence but I think he's smarter. He's funny as hell and makes me laugh. He's easy on the eye with a body I just want to grind on. And I can tell he'd appreciate my body equally. He'd pull back to take me all in; touch every part, caress every part. He'd leave no part on me untouched or without a kiss. He would certainly touch, caress, fuck and make love to me. Longest foreplay ever, 20 years in the making. I can certainly see him making up for lost time. I don't know what will happen. I know what I hope to happen I hope me holding my breath in isn't just from fear of a let down but because I'm cumming from him. |
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May 2023
AuthorReleasing some steam. You should want to know me, not just a woman with pent up passion. Oh yea and you should start this from the beginning. |